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Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
here it is 4:38am and i jsut found some of my fav japanese candies in my book bag while looking for my camera. i practically jumped out of my seat with joy.

i've been sitting here editing for hours.
this one piece i just reopened from august. i can tell it's going ot be one of my best edits , so i've convinced myself to just suck it up andjust do the best i can on it.
my dad just woke up to go to work. i dind't know he was working this saturday.
he's used to me being up at this hour.
i walked out of this room to give him a kiss and wish him well.
said, 'this edit is taking forever.'
he said, 'jsut take ur time.'
yea, i'm ready to be done and move on.

now that i've edited so mucha nd can visualize the production piece to the end, the rock journals are so much quicker. most uncut. but this one, i did in august! so it's everywhere. but it's good. and i like it.
i'm going to work for another hour.

tomorrow my mom and nana and i will go to whole foods, the mall for my mac lotion and maybe walmart. then i'll come back home and do some more stuff.

this week i'm meeting up with some really rad people. more producers, attorneys, and will have my bio done and add alot of stuff to the site.
My Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
18 February 2006 @ 01:05 am
....on a wost note, while i was in cali this past week, my grandmother (my dad's mom) was rushed to the hospital.
there they found out she had a tumor.
it's cancer,
colon canver
a day before i came back, they did surgery to remove it.
they did. and part of the intestine.
i spoke to her on the phone in cali on the roof of my hotel.
i thought, is this how it's always going to be? whenever i'm away, somehting happens.
hearing her voice ont he line was heart whenching. i wish i was there with my family.
the morning i left to cali to told my mom, 'when i get back i'm going to go to grandma's for a dad, interview her, cook her food.' and now it's too late. i spend time with loved ones, but i work alot. i never want to regret. i went to nana's (my mom's mom... papa's wife.. papa died in nov 05) i went to nana's yesterday and spent the day with her. she was so thankful she cried. she's so lonely.
i love her so much.

so today we found out the cancer had spread.
going in to remove the tunor might have done more damage than good. but at the time it was a must, since bile was going into her blood stream causing an infection.

my father was at the hospital today with all of his bros and sisters. my titi (aunt in spanish) mickey was crying so hard, eddie had to take her home. i remember when papa was dying how hard my mother and titi lillian took it. and that second he stopped breathing. ...
it was like, i knew it was coming. he'd stop... then start. then stop... and then he never started again.
my mom was dialing my uncle's number. then titi lillian yelled, he stopped! oh my GOD! he stopped breathing he's not breathing!!!
then everyone started crying really loud, and i jsut held my mom really close, but she just couldn't stand up, and was just in so much pain. lillian's husband was there.
i couldn't believe it. but i could, and i had to be strong. my mom loved him so much. there will be times when she'll/we'll just start crying. his laugh. his hands. everything that's anything love. Love. Love. Love. loving a human being. loving a dog. loving that living breathing creature that looks back at you. that responds. that has an affect of ur life.
to be here
then to be gone.
what if you love it to be here. and there's so much happiness with it.
that change is so hard to deal with.
my nana was married to papa for 55 years!
i havn't even been living that long.
he was amazing.
i video the last year of his life.
i can't watch them yet. but one day i'll make a documentary.
now my grandma.
i went to go see her today and she jsut kept telling me how much she loved me and how beautiful i was. i don't want her to die.
they think she won't be able to do the chemo and radiation b.c. of her diabetes and bad heart.
i really don't want her to die. aww my poor daddy. i hope he's ok. his dad died over 10 years ago.
i'll go see her tomorrow before we start errands.

staying healthy is so important b.c. it'll kik you in the ass sooner or later. sound is the last to go... with the mind all there, it's such a tragedy to have ur body fail you.
eat well (vegetables). exercise. drink 8 -8oz a day. don't smoke, drink alot. just show ur body love and appreciate. it's so good to you. :-)
My Current Mood: sadsad
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
how the heck it feels to have cramps!
the first day for me IS the worst!
i wake up feeling tired and drained.
my hips hurt.
my back hurts.
my head and stomache ache with cramping, throbing, pulsating pain only being asleep can cure.
besides taking medication, whihc i try to avoid, enduring this day is like torcher!
a hot shower helps.
stretching does too.
when i produce endorphans by running it relieves a certain tenstion. but most of the time i just want to lie down.

oh and the urges!!! OHH THOSE CRAVINGS!
i took a walk to the 7 11 3 blocks from my house, just to get a snickers bar.
My Current Mood: blahblah
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
08 February 2006 @ 02:23 am
WOW WOW WOW!!!!! let me just start by saying today was crazy awesome!! first off i had a kick ass session with Adam (one of my NYC producers) and the song came out AWESOME!!! it's called 'Suddenly' and it has such a cool vibe to it.
i think yall will like ittttttttttttttt!!!!!

ok! SO! back to my stoooooory. so mid session Adam's like, 'well i'm going to this show tonight; you should come!'
then i went like, 'well i'm leaving for LA to do some recording tomorrow, i really shouldn't.'
then i thought about it and was like... ok who are you going to see.
he said MoZella. so i went on her site and myspace, checked her out... said she opened for lifehouse and tyler hilton, then i was sold.

so i filmed mostly the whole day, so it was fun.
adam and i walked to the subway.
met a homeless man that was drunk and wouldn't stop talking.
got on the E train.
got off at 14tha nd 8th ave.
walked to 10ave, and we were there!
i was some MoZella fans waiting outsidde, so i interviewed them and it was AWESOME!!! (werd of the day LOL)

then we went inside.
adam i'm going to go explore, can you watch my bag

i walk around the place, then i find this cute room with words and photos (basically a colloge) on the walls. it was sooooooooo artistic aind great i got CHILLLZ!!

in this room there are 2 guys and a camera.
i say hi then run away to get my camera!
then i interview them and film a few fun things, they were AWESOME!!!!!
they were there to take pics of Mozella, but since she didn't get there, they took pictures of meeeeeeee!! HAHAHAHAHAHA it was a cool shot b.c. i was holding my camera with it's light on , to my face, and then i looked at thier camera. hhas such a poetic Andriana TV Flair (flare? sp? lol) to it!!!

a few minutes later, mozella came and got some pictures taken. i held my camera light up for a few seconds to help the photographers find their focus, then i was off to my NEXT STOP!!! front of stage!

had to get a good stop to film some of the show.

Mozella was reallllly sick, so she only sang like 3 or 4 songs. but they def had some authentic quality to them. ont he 2nd or 3rd song she called some fans up on stage to sing!!!!! how AWESOME!!! is that?

theeeeeeeeeen! during 2 songs, TYLER HILTON came up on stage and sang!!! it was great!!!!

after the show, i went back to where Adam was and some of his friends and we talked for a while.

I heard Tyler tell some poeple he knew that he was hungry and was going to leave to go eat, but i had it palnneda lready that i was taking the 10:35pm TRAIN! and it was already 9:45pm!!! so i was oh helll no tyler ain't going nooo whoooere! so i said, yo! haha no i'm just kidding i dind't say yo! i was polite and suggested we go to the artsy colloge room where it was quieter, so conduct a brief 1 minute interview.

so that's what we did. FUN FUN FUN... no AWESOME!!!!!!!

then after that! MoZella was going to leeeeeve. then i was like, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" (does animated cartoon animation in my mind, lol)

we also went into that rom ad did a quick 1 minute rock journal that rocked my socks off!!! then i got cold feet. oh shucks!

after that, i introduuced myself to some biz people then went outside to leave and meet with Adam.

we go outside and then there's this AWESOME!!!! guy named DALLAS jsut chilling ( totally used to watch that show DALLAS with my mom back in the eighties! hehe).
let me tellllllllll you! this guy was soooooo funny! it was one of the most funniest of the funnest most randomest goofiest interviewish thing EVERrrrrr!!! LOL

so i got about 5 episodes tongiht. and i really should edit it soon. but we'll see...
1.ALWAYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS be thankful for life and appreciate everything and the world around me.
2. This Week: record in LA
3. Next Week: Finish Last week's and This week's Rock Journals for AndrianaTV!
4. Also Next week: Last Session with Adam.
5. Also Next Week (lol): Publish major updates to AndrianaSantaigo.com

ohhhhhh! Wait til you see what's coming!!! tun tun tun! HA!

now question: should i wash my hair tonight or tomorrow morning? hmmm...

Love you all!!
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
31 January 2006 @ 10:15 pm
What ever he has to say. i want to hear it. i jsut got teary eyed when he mentioned how someone bombed a school (in another country i forget). GEEEZZZZ!!! as miss america as this may sound, i jsut wish there was peace on earth. i think it's great that woman now have more freedom in other countries, although there is much civil War still happening.

i would like to get more into knowing world news. as sad and depressing as it shall be at times, in the end, knowledge is power.

there was a new york times newspaper on the train the other day, and i was reading the world news section and it just hit me how i'd been leaving myself in the dark. for so long it's all so interesting.

there are so many humans being living thier lives in other parts of the world in such extrememly different conditions than what we're used to, and where we live. these are people jsut like us. what did i do to deserve to be born here, in nj, with these parents, and under this royal high standard of living? absolutely nothing. that's why i feel like i have to give back. i'm lucky, and i appreciate that. everyday i say a prayer and think about those who suffer.

another interesting subject to me is human tafficking?

espeially now since i'm going ot be living in a foreign country, knowing this type of info is very important. it can happen to anyone.
heres an article about a true story [url=http://english.pravda.ru/accidents/21/97/384/12384_slavery.html]Oyla's story[/url] [url=http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/02/23/48hours/main675913.shtml]48 hrs undercover (so interesting)[/url]

one if my dreams is to go to another country, and work with children. i'd live in a mud hut and give up hot showers. it's a calling of mine, and i can't wait until the time comes in my life where i can fullfill that dream.

President Bush is talking about Mentoring kids in your community. that's a great thing.

Interesting how the republicans stand up and clap and the democrats don't and hardly clap.
Interesting when he spoke about other options besides using oil.
Intersting to hear what the news reporters say after the speech is done. they just said we're broke and the Defecate is going up. Social Security for all the people (alot) born during the baby boom, retiring in the next few years will bring the taxes up, etc, b.c. there's jsut not enough money.

He spoke for 50 minutes.
now: 10:04pm

My Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
27 January 2006 @ 08:49 pm
today i've been singing all day just working the vox with some vocal exercises from this book called 'How to Train Singers' the 2nd edition http://www.clearvue.com/video/productDetail.asp?objectID=13829&keywordID=161§ions=all

there are exercises for every type of area in ur voice you want to train, it's great!

late last night i spend a few hours putting some images up on the site! and i worked on my bio a bit! fun fun fun! the site is coming along good. but my main focus now HAS to be my music. Once i'm gone, that's it! i can't go to NYC to continue recording the record. i'll only be able to work from my hotel room in Costa Rica on some fun experimental solo stuff. So Now's the time! the time to make it count. there are so many people i still want to collaborate with, but in time, in time.

life is an unfolding mystery. a process of constant growth. With successes and failures, and constant new experiences. even though i can steer my future in the direction of my vision, it's still one big ‘unknown’.

people change, feelings change, sitations change. alot of things fade over time, and i know that's a pessimistic way of looking it, but the ‘fade out’ leaves room for the ‘fade in’. ya can’t change what comes naturally. i just try to embrace the movement; sometimes it’s like a calm Caribbean ocean wave, other times like a Honolulu ocean wave!

I get sad when something that was once so good, just casually fades away. It could be a relationship that was once exciting and now it's boring, or a memory that was once magical and fun and is now sad or not the same. It could also be a friendship that was once strong and gradually without warning just began to unravel.

I guess the process is almost like the stages of healing in psychology http://www.psychologyhelp.com/chng41.htm .

I have random experiences I’d like to share:

About 2 years ago, I liked this guy so much and everything was perfect. we got along great, talked for hours, and i htought, “wow he's amazing, i really dig his personality, and so much about him.”
Meanwhile, in Andriana Land, i'm still daydreaming about him, walking on cloud 9, when suddenly it hit me. Something had changed. i started geting less phone calls, & then hardly any phone calls.
when I'd ask what was up, he'd act stupid (guys! pssshh!). until one day i was like, 'doooooooooooooooood'! (you know when u just have ‘had it’?) and you know what he told me?
“All fades.”
I was like standing there holding the phone with my mouth down to the floor. 'what the F%@#$* did he jsut say!?' was that the most insensitive, blunt thing anyone could ever say or what?!
well thanks for that! but unfortunately i was going for more of a specific reason, like the truth!
Yes, blah blah blah. i had faded. From his mind, etc.
But the real thing that defines a relationship, is another relationship. He had met someone else, and was more interested in her.
It's no easy task to tell someone that you’ve falling out of love/like with them either. so i could understand his anxiety. It takes true selflessness and courage to admit something so hurtful to someone.
It’s sad that someone will get hurt, but lies are worse.
Lies in disguise. ewww ::cringes:: I am a strong advocate of truth. Can I get a HELL YEA!?

we're still friends after all that, but i told him a thing or two about how he should act like a man and not a coward. Like he really wanted to hear that anyway. Some guys just have ‘it’ or don't. By 'it' I mean that unspoken understanding of how life works.
Some will learn. Some will never. In the end, it’s easier said than done. It's just a simple judgment call of, 'are we meant for each other? Are we compatible? Could I see you as my best friend? And even if these answers are all yes today, they may fade with tomorrow.
if the answers are no, then don't waste your time. move on!

Another situation of fading happened with one of my best friends and I. 2 different people, 2 different situations. The first person and situation was with someone I was best friend’s with in high school. At some point when we'd get together after HS things started changing. The way he spoke, handled situations and his points-of- view were just completely opposite of how I carried myself and handled things. He went to college; I stayed in NYC to pursue music. That’s a big difference, but I’m not necessarily convinced that it was our way different lives, experiences and environments that veered us further apart. Some human minds just mesh and some don't. He is who he is, I am who I am.
That fun, care-free understanding (aura), just faded into this serious, confusing friendship of unreliability and disappointment. NOT a good combination!
Breaking up a friendship is like breaking up with a boyfriend/girlfriend!! We realized it just wasn’t working out, and jsut agreeded to disagree and be cool, on a neutral level with respect.
On the other hand i've had a friend move away in the middle of high school, (she's 2 years younger), and we've had obvious growing up stages and experiences of change, and have kept in touch and are still close.
It’s all about time, love, change, natural tendencies, situations, admitting truth, confessing, and accepting one another.

Happiness is in surrounding yourself with positiveness.

Wax on. Wax off. Fade in. Fade out. Truth. Lies. Change. Stay. Good. Bad. Happy. Sad. Loves Me. Loves Me Not. Loves You. Loves You Not. Flowers are born closed. A happy flower dies open. Give me a flower unclipped. Lets grow Herbs. I like mint tea. In my mind, I’m on the beach. Its 92 degrees F. I Close my eyes and hear the birds. Listen to how each wave breathes individually. Soft. The sand. Finger tips. Warm sand. Refreshing water. I drink. I smell the flower. I taste the love. Feel the truth. Wait. Listen.
My Current Mood: gratefulgrateful
Current Music!!: Princesses Fan. No Music. Just my fingers tying thoughts.
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
19 January 2006 @ 09:24 pm
My mother had surgery today... she had her gallbladder taken out, http://www.sages.org/sagespublication.php?doc=PI11.
not too much of a big deal, but still nerve wrecking, cuz i love my mommmy so much! and anything can happen when u have any kind of surgery, but everything turned out ok, and now she's home relaxing.
i did some more flash stuff for the site while in the waiting room.
we came home, then i rehersed for the studio tomorrow...
went to the craft store, got some gemstones. AND THEEEEEEEEEEEN found the strongest gem glue in the world! THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN pimped my SIDEKICK! (FLIPPER Jr.).
ok see, jsut in case u didn't know, my powerbook's name is: Princess.
My Blanky's name is: Blue (i sleep with him and he's silky so soft!)
THEEEEEEEEEN! i reallllly needed a new bag travel carry bag, so i bought the most perfectest one at staples.
it's the biggest most multi-compartmental bag i've ever owned (well maybe except when i was in 4th grade for some reason lol), but i'm in love with it, it's great and perfect in EVERYWAY!!!!! it's got a place for princess, lots of clothes, my recording equiptment i'll need to carry around, esp for Costa Rica, then my water, my phones, my toiletries, EVERYTHING! books, chargers, external harddrives, everyhing. i'm pseyched. tomrorow iwll be my first day, and it's going to be so great on my shoulders.
oh and his name is Buddy!!!!!! BUD for short.

So Flipper Sr. broke last week, and Jr. just came in the mail 2 days ago. i can't stop move it around, as it catches the light, it jsut makes my tummy tickle!!! LOL ahhh
Me LOOOOOOOVEZ SPARKELY thingssssssss! Shineeeeey!

Anyway, i really need to pimp out my myspace fer hizzzo!
My Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
15 January 2006 @ 01:24 am
i just finish watching Vanilla Sky, when i hear a rumbling sound outside. it's in front of my house; curious, i get up to look. slowly i walk over to the mini blind and day dream about how in scary movies there is always someone staring right back at ur once that one single solitary mini blind flap is moved. no! this is not going to happen, just be brave and look!, i tell myself.
what i saw next i will never forget!

for the past 12 hours i have been making my first ever man pants!
yes, i've designed many-a- woman pants for my self in my day, but never a MAN PANT! til now.... whiach are coming alone pretty groovy, if i ever finish sewing the right amount of sequence before i can begin the fun part!

so anyway, back to tongiht 'shocking moment'...
i'll give you a hint:
a man with 3 balls
muted silence
get it yet!?!??!!?

last clue.
i'm assuming it's about 5 inches.

My Current Mood: sillysilly
Current Music!!: plows in the night.
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
wait... wild audience member? haha what's new? anyway here's my story:

Ooooooooooooooh WOW!!!
Ok let me set the picture for you.
I’m drinking some water, oh shit I need to get my ticket out! (now: 9:34pm)
Ok I’m back! Now: (9:35pm)
Ok, so back to setting the picture!
::(Said in a detective voice):: I’m in cart 1377. One of the older ones, but I like It cuz then I can plug princess in. Princess is my laptop. We Toight.

It’s about 9:35pm on a Thursday and the middle of January. The city iz a-buzz because of the surprisingly high temperature. It’s 56 degrees! hmmm suspicious… Could this be global warming? Newark international airport, our first stop.

My feet are comfortably propped onto the seat in front of me. This helps me hold my computer and relieves my feet that are sore from standing at the mic in the studio and FROM A STROKES SHOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
That’s right!
I just saw the strokes!!!!!! YEA!!!!
Ok first of all it was flipping marvelously AWESOME!!!!!
Second of ALLL it was for a FUSE SHOW! So on MONDAY it’ll AIR and I’ll perfectly not be able to see it ::yells:: BECAUSE I DON’T HAVE FUSE!!!!!!
But anyway! the show is Called, “Seventh Avenue Drop”!
I’m was front of Julian Dancing MY ASS OFF!!!!!!
Seriously I had serges of excited energy just flowing threw my body like I just had a shot of expresso or something. It was so much fun!
And I’m not gonna lie, deze boys are super sexy in person, I waz like, “oh! Oh! Catch me” ::passes out::
So since scott (the Fuse casting director) put me in the front with a few other crazy chicks, we had to come up with a plan with the camera guy. He’d be going in between us for some shots of Julian, so we had to communicate throughout the show. He just had a baby, and showed us the picture, so cute!
That guy and the other rad camera dooodz got me a few times going absolutely insane and singing werds I didn’t even know, half the time! So I def have to find a way to get a copy of that show, maybe I can get it from scott.
They performed some old songs and some new songs..
During the middle of the show the guitar player with long hair lit a cigerette and they passed it around.
It was def worth going! I made some new friends, Saw some old ones; Jaime and Alex.

Other than that, today was OOOOOOOk.
First, I had to wake up early. NOT GOOD! But seriously, I’m going to have to get used to it because I’m sure in Costa Rica I’ma haf to wake up reeeeeallly early most days.
THEN! I walk out of my house and I’m like, damn, I feel like I’m forgetting something, I should check to see if I have my phone. The whooooooole ride to the train station I’ve got this missing something feeling. I get into the train and look in my bag… NO PHONE! I’m like AHHHHHHHHH!!!! %#$#$@#@#$*@@!!!!
Thennnnnnnn the train a head of us breaks down. So I’m on it for 2 hours! Instead of 1hr 15min. grrrrr…. My butt was soooooo sore! LOL I had to like get up and stretch! haahhaha
So I get to the studio a half hour late.

But other than that, it’s been pretty interesting without a phone all day. I feel sort of connected and disconnected all at the same time. Obviously I feel disconnected from those who I usually talk to on a daily basis. But who I REALLY feel Connected with is myself! It’s like all that energy that would have gone towards a phone call just stayed inside of me. And built up and up and up and up and now I feel content. Kinda creative! Like I can go home and write a song or something! …since I didn’t spend the day telling someone exactly what was happening or blah, blah, blah. So It’s all inside my head fresh and very comprehendible. Or I just feel pretty level headed, it’s weird.
I remember when my friend erl never had a cell phone bc. He said, “I just want to feel free when I’m out and doing stuff, and I don’t want to feel like someone can reach me at their beckon call”. Yes, I understand that, but a cell phone can bring you freedom AS WELLL!.
1) you can call anyone anytime.
2) get emails and surf the internet.
3) Just play with it, when ur bored, or want to look cool.
4) Type email address or phone numbers when u meet new people
5) Emergency!!!

But instead of putting my energy into looking at an inanimate, digital object, I opened my eyes to maybe saw something I would have missed.

Pointless rhyming poem with the sounds ‘out’, ready and GO!
Peace out!
No doubt!
Shout out!
The route!
A pout drought!

Ok no not really. Never shout out about a route without a pout drought! B.c. that would mean the route is full of pouts and I’d prefer to shout out about a route without a smile drought.

Thank you thank you, please hold your applause.
My Current Mood: bouncybouncy
Current Music!!: STROKES: New York City Cops!
Andriana Santiago (andriana_116)
11 January 2006 @ 12:33 am
today was a fun day!
we brought this one song down a half step, realizing it was jsut a bit too high for comfort, and now it's perfect!
well that's all i have to say, i'm tired and going to go to sleep now
My Current Mood: draineddrained